Monday, May 31, 2010

My Nature Valley Run story: To run or not to run

Should I continue running or should I just stop?”

This was the loud argument in my mind during the Nature Valley Run last Sunday. I registered for 21K. I missed it. It’s been a while since I joined the 21K category.

I was in High Street as early as 3:30 am. I was so excited I even told my friend not to bring the car so we wouldn’t have to worry about parking which might delay us like the last Century Tuna run. We took pictures, ate banana and had Gatorade. Before I headed to the start line, I met a TBR DM classmate who was running 10K. At the start line, I met two other TBR DM classmates who thought 21K would be easy for me because I finished our marathon with a good time. I said no because really each race for me is always like the first time.

I was very excited. I did not set any target. I just wanted to enjoy the run. It was a very relaxing pre run feel.

So why did I think of quitting?

Reason #1: ACID REFLUX

After running the first five kilometers, I felt a sudden pain in my stomach which has been bothering my runs last week. It was an acid reflux. A problem I used to have. Now, it’s making a grand come back. I wanted to vomit several times while running. It made me feel dizzy. My hands were starting to get cold.

Assault: I just drank water and had gel. I suspected it was the acid from Gatorade and insufficient pre-race meal. That morning I ate less than what I usually have. That’s the same theory I had in my recent runs.

Lesson: I should be more disciplined with my diet. Since I started to maintain my weight and was eating less than before, I realized that my stomach could not contain heavy eating anymore. While I thought that it was good, I think I kind of exaggerated it. I probably, without being deliberate, was eating less than my usual diet. Being too busy with other responsibilities also made eating in regular intervals impossible. I had several hungers causing the reflux.

Reason #2: NUMBING ARMS

Maybe because of the acid reflux, my arms were slowly numbing at Km5. It was a strange feeling. I felt like it’s starting to get cold as well. I could hardly swing it.

Assault: I swayed it repeatedly and allowed the blood to flow.

Lesson: Since I suspected that it was due to the stomach problem, diet is also the solution.

Reason #3: HEAD ACHING

This is a confession. I ran without enough sleep. At about the same time when I had the acid reflux, I also began to gasp for air. My head was aching and floating. My legs could hardly move. I usually rest the whole day before a race especially if I’m joining half or full marathon but not last Saturday.

I was not getting enough sleep the entire week last week because of too much work and frustration about what’s happening in Congress. I made it worse by attempting to run with friends last Saturday morning. We set it at 6:00 am. I knew I shouldn’t do it since Saturday was my only time to oversleep. I gambled and still said yes. I set the alarm clock at 4:30 am and attempted to get up but I couldn’t. But because something was set, I couldn’t go back to deep sleep anymore. That’s me. I have a hard time saying no to invitations.

So the Friday sleep was bad. I should have tried to recover by resting but I could not. I had to attend to a family duty which I was happy I did. That’s something I never set aside. For me, it’s always family first. I actually still had enough time to rest after that thing with my family but I went out with friends. It was important for me as well. I wanted so much to be with my friends and catch up. And because I’m one person who wants to be able to do everything, I went out with them and even if I could go home earlier, I chose to stay late.

Assault: Nothing. I thought coffee could do the trick but it did not. I just filled my system with more caffeine from gels.

Lesson: Take rest and sleep as serious as training. No gimmicks before race day.

Reason #4: KNEE INJURY

If you saw me during the run, you must have noticed the pain in my face. It was so obvious I was biting my lips because it was so excruciating. It's an injury caused by my scoliosis at the lower back. My left leg is longer so it takes most of the pressure when running. I usually have it immediately after but never during long runs and it disappears the following day. When I ran the TBR Marathon last week I felt the pain while running but it was tolerable unlike yesterday. When we reached the Buendia flyover, it hit me. I thought my left knee was going to break into pieces. I could hardly move it. I almost screamed.

Assault: I walked to give my running muscles some rest and placed ice on it. I ran slow and easy until I felt it was better.

Lesson: Have it checked. Don’t be afraid to hear the doctor say I should get some rest, etc. Maybe do more strengthening exercises both for my knees and back.

Reason#5: TERRIBLE SATURDAY

I had a bad Saturday. My friend and I went to the gym for swimming. On our way there, we hit something and had to have the car fixed. As if that stress was not enough, another terrible thing happened.

After swimming, we decided to go to a car wash station. I left my bag in a chair beside us, stood up and checked the car. After 10 seconds, a man in his motorbike passed by and snatched my bag. I lost all my swimming stuff, worse including my TBR marathon finisher’s shirt. It was a lost investment. Our house key was also lost so we were worried the snatcher might be able to trace where we live. Although I was able to convince myself to let go, I felt that it was weighing on me while running.

Assault: Let go. There are things I have no control over. I tried to focus on the bright side that it was not the other bag where more valuables were that was snatched.

Lesson: Be more careful.

I had many walks compared to my previous 21Ks but I had to do it to sustain my energy until the finish line. Yes, I ran through pain because I knew I could still do it. I was sure my body could still take the pain otherwise I wouldn’t mind quitting to avoid a greater disaster. The decision to go on was a calculated risk. I carefully listened to my body more than that voice called pride telling me that quitting is only for losers. I think that the wisdom to discern when to stop or go is a constant challenge for runners. I believe that to stop if pain spells a greater, long term tragedy is as noble as having the strength and motivation to surpass the pain until the finish.

I was happy I did not quit and heard my body right. I hope that when I find myself in the same situation, I’d still be able to decide with wisdom and strength to go on and humility and courage to stop.

But all these ordeals were replaced with joy because of two surprises- a 2:05 finish and a pint of delicious Haagen Dazs ice cream. :)



Wednesday, May 26, 2010

My thank you letter to THE BULLRUNNER



Hi Jaymie,

They say that what's more important is not the destination but the journey. My TBR Dream Marathon proved this true.

Until now, I am still overwhelmed with extreme joy everytime I think of the TBR Dream Marathon. When I talk about it with friends and other runners, I don't talk about my finish but the experience. Although I was happy with my finish, what was more significant was the atmosphere during the run. I liked it that there was no competition or anything of the sort. All of us, while journeying towards the fulfillment of each of our dreams, were also journeying alongside each other. Everyone wanted nothing but to see everyone cross the finish line without any injury. We'd all encourage each other along the way and that was so amazing. I felt humbled to be with the rest of the runners who were so driven to fulfill their dreams. When I had cramps at Km30 and could hardly run, what encouraged me aside from the cheerers and my two buddies was the motivation that I saw in the eyes of my classmates. I felt not only that we were a community of dreamers but a family. We celebrated each other's victory and sympathized and helped each other, including the volunteers and chasers, in times of pain.

I could not stop talking about the marathon. I told my running friends that it was the best race ever, with all the support and very organized logistics, I could not think of anything better.

Although my family was not able to join me in Nuvali, they celebrated with me in finishing my second marathon. It was big deal for them because it proved once again how strong and healthy I am unlike last year when I was suspected of having thyroid cancer. The first quarter of 2009 was one of my darkest moments. As a breadwinner, I dreaded hearing that news that I might have cancer. The fear of who'd take care of my family and all set in. It was also the time when I went through another personal experience that made me so depressed. That time, I was drowned with the desire to live and to die at the same time. I went through several tests that weakened my body to rule out the big C. After a few months, thank God it was negative. Thank God I discovered running and got the chance to be part of the first TBR Dream Marathon :)

When close friends asked me about my secret on how I was able to finish the marathon faster than the first one, I told them it was because of the two running buddies who pushed me beyond my limits and kept me company from Km 21 to the finish line. I first came across Kuya Lito who requested me to pace him. I said yes but warned him that I might ruin his target time. He said his target was 4:00, I told him mine was only sub-5. But he said ok. So we ran a kilometer together and met Kuya Brian. I did not know what his target time was but he decided to join us or Kuya Lito and I decided to join him.

I learned that Kuya Lito was a competing runner during his high school days but stopped due to a doctor's advise who said he could not run anymore because his knees could no longer handle it. So he set aside running for quite a while but decided to reunite with it recently and proved his doctor wrong. Kuya Brian, on the other hand, is a runner and a cyclist. The TBR Dream Marathon was their first.


After running a few kilometers together, I told them to just go ahead because cramps wanted to join the TBR Dream Marathon too :) It was so painful I wanted to stop and just walk the rest of the race. But they stayed with me and helped me deal with it until it's gone. They encouraged me to keep on running. They jogged with me not minding how it would affect their target time. They'd also remind me to slow down on downhills after I told them I have scoliosis which was why I had a bad run during Condura. In short, I had new-found Kuyas who took good care me and were more conscious than I was that I be the first woman finisher. I loved the way we fulfilled our promise that whatever happens we'd cross the finish line together. When Kuya Lito was feeling the pain in his knees and asked us to run ahead, we also did not leave him. We walked with him so his knees could get some rest. Kuya Brian was the strongest among us. After crossing the 32 km post, he started to coach us until the finish line. He'd tell us when to stop to rest and when to run at what pace so we could finish well. He even reminded us to fix up as we were approaching the finish line so we'd look good on camera :)

I heard him say countless times that pain was just in the mind and I realized he was right.

I owe that strong and fast finish to them, to my classmates, to the volunteers and organizers, to Coach Jim and to you :)

In this run, I gained not just a wonderful medal and finisher's shirt, loot bag and souvenirs but also fresh perspective and friends.

I don't know how to thank you enough.

Reylynne


Tuesday, May 4, 2010

THE “GODS” ARE DEAD



Independence is the soul of the judiciary. I strongly believe this, therefore I think that this Supreme Court is dead.

The dismissal of the Motion for Reconsideration of the Supreme Court decision allowing the President to appoint a Chief Justice despite the constitutional ban made the judiciary suffer death twice.

I am immensely disappointed with this move by the same justices that lambasted the sanctity of the constitution in honor of lies and twisted logic in their decision that the appointment ban does not cover the judiciary even if the Constitution does not say so. The moment they inked the word “FINAL” in their decision on the motion for reconsideration, they also engraved another count of shame in the tombstone of the court.

But I am not surprised that the Court has let go of the opportunity to redeem itself and insisted on the correctness of their decision despite sound arguments from legal luminaries and overwhelming public outrage. The Court, as revealed in the recent public interview of candidates for the Chief Justice view public opinion irrelevant and irreverent.

While I agree that it is from the Constitution that the decision of the Supreme Court emanates, I disagree in the extreme disregard of public opinion especially from framers of the Constitution in such a time as this when the political climate that surrounds the issue is highly controversial. This poses the danger of having a court that embodies tyranny and self- righteousness.

The dismissal of the Motion for Reconsideration and the recent public interview exposed many repugnant faces of the Supreme Court including its absurd understanding of judicial independence that manifested in their recent actions.

The absurdity of the Court’s decision that set aside existing jurisprudence on the same issue has unearthed the politics and vested interests that maneuvered it. Considering the political context of the decision, I could not help but believe the speculations that the Court, while has chosen to be independent of public view and scrutiny, has opened its doors so widely to the possibility of escalating perception that it is controlled not by their conscience or the Constitution, as they claim but by the one that gave them the space in the High Court.

And while it can be said that the legal battle is over when the motion for reconsideration was dismissed, CSOs stand firm on its ground that midnight appointments is prohibited by the Constitution, therefore continues to impugn the decision of the Supreme Court.

People may be wounded but we do not grow numb and we will never be silenced by the repeated mischief of the Supreme Court. Unlike the court, we are still alive and we say, “HISTORY WILL JUDGE US, dead or alive.”


Post Script: My first midnight (organized) run was the one on this issue. I had fun running the frustration off along with almost a hundred "zombie" runners